Birthday Beer Quotes

My birthday is tomorrow parents.?
I am currently doing a card for my father. I need some good quotes for it. He is a drinker beer, loves hockey and soccer, and has a great "belly." She likes funny quotes on your stomach, actually. Thank you.
"No diet will remove all fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you may look good, but all I can do is run for public office. "
Crap Attack